dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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