Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
