The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
