you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
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they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
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You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod