if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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