I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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