Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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