So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
