did you get engaged???
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
