Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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