took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
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