im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize