Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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