There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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