awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
