i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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