And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
he just fucked me for my cheese.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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