Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
