I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
