I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
