i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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