Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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