Texts From Last Night

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  (863): View more from Florida

  If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.

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  (863): If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat. http://tfl.nu/9rvo
  Replies (21) Good night (1040) Bad night (3751)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that

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  (217): You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that http://tfl.nu/ym20
  Replies (53) Good night (1453) Bad night (3046)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.

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  (480): I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts. http://tfl.nu/t2zp
  Replies (32) Good night (963) Bad night (8097)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has

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  (519): She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has http://tfl.nu/fgce
  Replies (14) Good night (3668) Bad night (888)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship

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  (713): Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship http://tfl.nu/tzas
  Replies (14) Good night (2606) Bad night (1151)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on

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  (905): It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on http://tfl.nu/h715
  Replies (9) Good night (2115) Bad night (1308)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.

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  (330): He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet. http://tfl.nu/wg57
  Replies (5) Good night (990) Bad night (592)
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  (696): View more from

  Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?

  (451): View more from

  Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes

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  (696): Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right? (451): Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes http://tfl.nu/39ll
  Replies (7) Good night (2144) Bad night (539)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.

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  (920): I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background. http://tfl.nu/kwpk
  Replies (6) Good night (1200) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point

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  (828): At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point http://tfl.nu/0f47
  Replies (3) Good night (794) Bad night (501)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Why am I wearing a dog collar

  (1-336): View more from North Carolina

  Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.

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  (336): Why am I wearing a dog collar (1-336): Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic. http://tfl.nu/ep7j
  Replies (4) Good night (1236) Bad night (457)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar

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  (701): three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar http://tfl.nu/w5kc
  Replies (0) Good night (391) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.

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  (740): Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people. http://tfl.nu/9aw0
  Replies (6) Good night (698) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.

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  (304): Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS. http://tfl.nu/aruy
  Replies (5) Good night (158) Bad night (661)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging

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  (251): The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging http://tfl.nu/8h2b
  Replies (1) Good night (332) Bad night (111)

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