But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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