Buhtt sex?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
