No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
