Buhtt sex?
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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