Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
