escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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