i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize