Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
