so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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