covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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