real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
where are my eyebrows?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
