It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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