Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
