My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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