She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
