i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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