I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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