Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
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