We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
