i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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