My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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