I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
