It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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