What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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