Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
