note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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