Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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