this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
